Prologue: Oh My God! I Have Omi’s Stubby Legs!
Disclaimer: WK isn’t mine. I seriously think I was drunk when I wrote this! Why is Ken singing “Teddy Bear” of all things?!
~ ~ ~
Before the mission...
“Oh let me be!” Ken began singing as he rearranged some flowers by the window. “Oh let me be...your teddy bear! I just wanna be your teddy bear!”
“So *you’re* the one who changed the station on my car radio!” Yohji exclaimed. “I knew it! Your icicle of a lover there is too stiff to like music and the chibi is too young to remember those days.”
“We’re *all* too young to remember those days, Yohji-kun.” Omi corrected.
Yes, it was another beautiful day in Koneko No Sume Ie and it was an hour before the usual hoard of schoolgirls made their way inside. Ken was singing to himself, sending smiles in Aya’s direction. “Teddy Bear” had been the song he was singing to him for the past few nights. That and “I Can’t Help Falling In Love With You” were Aya’s new favorite lullabies. It hadn’t been long since he and Ken admitted how they felt about each other. Though it surprised Yohji and Omi that the normally cold Aya cared about gentle Ken, they didn’t say anything against it. After all, it was good that Aya had someone other than his poor sister to fight for.
Now Ken was beginning to croon again. “Wise men say...only fools rush in! But I can’t help...falling in love...with you!” He placed a kiss on Aya’s cheek. When no one else was looking, Aya smiled back at him.
“Five...four...” Yohji began counting down the seconds before the schoolgirls came in. “Three...two...”
Giggles and greetings burst through the door along with girls dressed in their uniforms, ready for another day at school. Almost immediately, the men were flocked by them. Aya and Ken separated, going back to work as usual. Most of the girls just lingered around so Aya decided to send them off.
“Look, if you will not buy anything, then leave!” He snapped. Ken felt like melting. That saying changed every time but it always sounded so sweet and sexy coming from his lover’s lips. In his head, he began to sing again, *Shall I stay? Would it be a sin? For I can’t help...falling in love...with you!*
“Ken-san! Will you please help me?” One girl asked, standing by the sunflowers.
“Oh! Oh, sure! One minute.” Ken grinned at Aya, who was still trying to shoo those girls away, before heading off to help that girl. He finished the song off in his head, *Take my hand! Take my whole life too! For I can’t help...falling in love...with you!*
The hours went by fast. Aya managed to chase a couple of girls away. Yohji made a date with a few of the older customers who had come in. Omi was being sweet to everyone. And Ken offered help to whoever needed it. This was the typical scene at Koneko. It would be so strange to see the boys switch places. It wouldn’t be right.
For what seemed like it was going to be a quiet day was cut short by Manx’s arrival. She was unusually early today so they knew what this meant: the next mission would be serious. Very serious. She looked around, making sure there was no one other than the four of them. Even Momoe had disappeared somewhere. Yes, she had come on time.
“New mission.” She told them and they proceeded down to the basement.
* * *
During the mission...
It was not a pleasant sound. A ‘boom’ normally meant that something had exploded nearby and whoever was in the path of the explosion would either be hurt or possibly killed. At the very least, they’d be affected emotionally. The men of Weiß were no exception. Tonight, the ‘boom’ came from the factory where their targets had been hiding. Oh, the mission had been successful. All four of the ‘evil ones’ were lying dead inside, killed by each of the Weiß assassins. But no one accounted for the bomb that had been in there. And if it wasn’t bad enough, there were a lot of strange chemicals and stuff hidden inside.
Ultimately it was Omi who found and tried his hardest to disable the wicked ticking machine. Ken looked nervously over Aya’s shoulder, gripping his lover’s arm and silently hoping that the youngest assassin would be successful. Omi turned around, his handsome face pale, and shook his head.
“It’s no use! We have to leave! Now!” Omi yelled to the others. Aya nodded silently, then turned to Yohji and Ken. They didn’t need to question him. What they needed to do was escape before they were broiled alive in the explosion. So they ran as far as they could and the moment they reached outside, the place went...
The force of the explosion propelled all four of them up into the air and down onto the pavement. Ken remembered being having Omi next to him and looking over in Aya’s direction. His lover hadn’t looked back at him since they made their way out of that factory. They were a good distance away from the explosion so the flames or the debris from the building hadn’t hurt them. However, it was enough to throw them down and land on their heads. Land hard, that is.
Hard enough to go unconscious for a few minutes.
Hard enough to forget what they had been doing before landing on the ground.
Hard enough to know that some of those strange chemicals in the building had burst out of their tubes and sent out horrible, unusual fumes that drenched the air they breathed and had entered their bodies. It didn’t take long for some of those smells to disappear into the night as well. Others lingered around longer.
If they had been closer to that building, they could have been killed. Obviously this mission had not been as easy as they had anticipated. But they were successful. That’s all that mattered. Unconscious, slightly bruised but alive and successful. The pain was a small price to pay.
Yohji groaned, being the first of the assassins to come out of his state of unconsciousness and feeling a headache coming on. Oh, he needed a cigarette and he needed it before he went crazy. Reaching into his pocket, he tried to pull out the box. Instead, he found himself holding a handful of darts.
*What the hell?* He wondered. How did Omi’s darts get into *his* coat pockets? Did the chibi accidentally misplace them or something? He wasn’t the type to do that. Oh well. It didn’t matter. Omi was still young, he could do things like this. Now for those cigarettes...
He reached into his other pocket...and pulled out more darts. Okay, Omi’s little habit of putting darts everywhere was getting on his nerves. The others were starting to groan next to him and come around. Head still pounding, Yohji looked at the darts in his hands. He also noticed his hands were a little smaller than normal.
*Did I shrink or something?* He asked himself. After all, they *had* been in a factory with strange chemicals and junk inside. As horrible as it would be to shrink, it wouldn’t surprise him too much. Plus his pants felt a little too small...and he could see his legs.
“Something’s not right here.” He said in a singsong voice. These legs...so clean and stubby...definitely weren’t his. And his shoes...why was he wearing red sneakers? Everything looked too small. Oh yes, something was not right in this little picture. His cigarettes were replaced by Omi’s darts and he was wearing clothes that weren’t his. Rather they looked like things Omi would wear...
*Oh no! No way in hell! It can’t be!* Yohji suddenly had a bad feeling what had happened. Looking over himself, he saw that he was wearing *Omi’s* clothes! Catching his reflection in the window of the building he landed next to, he saw Omi’s curious blue eyes staring back at him. He had Omi’s blond hair and cute face. In short, he was Omi.
“What...the...hell?” He asked himself, only it came out in Omi’s voice. Hands against his face, he began rubbing them up and down. Yes, this was Omi’s body. He was trapped in Omi’s body.
But who the hell was trapped in his? He noticed that the others were starting to get up. Ken rubbed his eyes and shook his head.
“Ah...Aya-kun...Yohji-kun...Ken-kun...are you all right?” He asked.
“Omittichi?” Yohji asked, guessing that who had switched bodies with Ken.
‘Ken’ caught sight of ‘Omi’ and gasped. “That’s me!”
“We’re dead, aren’t we?” Yohji asked miserably.
“I don’t think so...” Omi didn’t know who was in his body.
“Yohji. It’s me, Yohji.”
“That’s right, chibi.”
“What are you doing my body?”
“I don’t know!” Yohji moaned. “But I want out! I’m cold! Don’t you wear anything other than shorts?!”
“I’m serious! My ass is freezing!”
“That’s the *least* of our problems, Yohji-kun! I’m in Ken-kun’s body and you are in mine! So where are Aya-kun and Ken-kun, huh?”
“I just wanna be your teddy bear.” ‘Aya’ murmured on cue, sitting up. Blinking his violet eyes, he saw that Omi, Yohji, and Ken were up. Wait a minute...Ken?! No, that was not possible. It couldn’t be. He felt the strands of hair hanging down by his face, realizing they were the blood-red eartails of his lover. And his left ear felt heavy...because of the long gold earring hanging on it. In his hand was Aya’s katana. Eyes wide, he caught sight of his reflection in the window. Violet eyes stared back instead of brown ones. He was Aya now.
“Ken-kun? Is that you?” The person who was now ‘Ken’ asked. The real Ken nodded.
“I’m in Aya’s body somehow.” He replied. “And you’re in mine. Aren’t you, Omittichi?”
“Uh-huh. Yohji-kun is in mine.”
“Then Aya is...” Ken began when Omi (Yohji) groaned.
“Oh no! No! It can’t be! Anyone but him!”
‘Yohji’ stood up and brushed himself off without saying a word. He took off his sunglasses and looked at them as if they were a piece of scum. He pushed back a lock of his blond hair. ‘Omi’ felt like crying at that moment.
“Are you all right?” ‘Aya’ asked.
“I’m fine.” ‘Yohji’ replied in an emotionless tone. “But why am I dressed like Yohji?”
“Dressed like Yohji?! You *are* Yohji!” ‘Omi’ exclaimed. “You’re me! Don’t you know what happened?! Our bodies and minds were switched!”
“What?” ‘Yohji’ raised an eyebrow.
“It’s true, koi.” ‘Aya’ added. “I’m in your body now and Omi is in mine.”
“But I still can’t figure how it happened.” ‘Ken’ mused. “We escaped in time and the force of explosion pushed us onto the pavement, causing us to lose consciousness for a few minutes. Oh yes, let’s not forget the potentially dangerous chemicals that were in that building. They may have factored into our switching bodies.”
‘Aya’ smiled. “Wow! I said all that?! You make me sound intelligent, Omittichi!”
‘Ken’ nodded weakly. “Yes...anyway, this may be why we are in our present predicament. Now how we’re going switch back to normal is a mystery. It may take days to come up with a solution.”
“Days?!” ‘Omi’ exclaimed. “Days?! I cannot be in the chibi’s body for days! What about my date?! I have two next weekend! What the hell do I tell the ladies, huh? Oh girls, I can’t go out with you anymore because I’ve switched bodies with a seventeen-year old who has stubby little legs!”
“Stubby little legs?” ‘Ken’ twitched an eyebrow.
“Omi has a point, Yohji.” ‘Aya’ said before an argument could arise. “We’re not going to solve this problem tonight. I say we don’t stay here any longer. Let’s go.”
“But my dates...” ‘Omi’ started up again.
“Fine! I’ll go on them!” ‘Yohji’ snapped.
‘Omi’ thought about the disaster that would ensue on those days. Aya was going on his dates. Oh yes, he really wanted to cry now.
* * *
I gave Ken brown eyes, like in the manga. I probably should have done with Yohji, giving him brown hair instead of blond. But I *always* picture him as a blond when I write my fics. I don’t know why. So there you go.
(Bleah! I know this part may have gone fast but I meant to do so. In case you’re wondering, YES! ‘Yohji’ does go on a date! (Be afraid. Be *very* afraid.) Once again, I’m sorry I’ve delayed the making of my lemon. Hopefully, I can come up with a good beginning to it. WSIR is also on mediaminer.org in case anyone wants to read it as a R fic. Not much difference, just the lemon scene will be making it longer. I’ll probably put this one up there too. So I hope I’ve done good again. )
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